Erika Ettin column: Merging technology and 'Sex and the City': A match or a mistake?

Erika Ettin helps people navigate the world of online dating.

Erika Ettin is the founder of A Little Nudge, where she helps others navigate the often intimidating world of online dating.

I was sitting in my room at my parents’ house in New Jersey when I heard the loudest guffaw coming from the master bedroom … and it was from my dad. I assumed he was watching some “manly” show that I’d never find funny. Nope. What was he watching? "Sex and the City." From that day on, I became an avid "Sex and the City" fan.

Fast forward to my life today. I’m a dating coach, helping people navigate the world of online dating. I often get compared to Carrie Bradshaw, because we both write dating columns but also because we both happen to have the signature wavy curls … and we’re both petite women with not-so-petite personalities.

Since starting my business almost 10 years ago, something crossed my mind at various points: What would "Sex and the City" be like if it were filmed today? Back then, there was no text message to be confused about, no Instagram to stalk your ex, and no lexicon like “ghosting,” “zombieing” or “kittenfishing.”

It looks like all of my questions might be answered soon, though, because it was just announced that our beloved show will be coming back, not as a reboot (like the too many iterations of "90210") but as a revisit, and I, for one, am excited.


I remember that the most egregious thing I could think of when watching the show the first time around was that Berger broke up with Carrie on a — dare I even say it? — Post-it note. The horror! These days, a Post-it note, while classless and cowardly, is still better than the ghosting we see running rampant. Not that it makes it better, but at least Carrie knew the relationship was over rather than wondering for three weeks if Berger was just stuck under a rock somewhere and his cellphone obviously died.

How about online dating sites? Can you imagine Carrie swiping on Tinder? Or, more likely, Raya, an app for influencers and celebrities? (I’ve tried getting on to no avail, for what it’s worth.) Well, maybe we’ll get to see that. When the story ended, Carrie, Miranda, and Charlotte (Samantha will not be in this new series) were all married. But, as we all know, marriages don’t always mean what we want them to mean or last as long as we want them to last. Many end, some unceremoniously, some through an event of some kind, some through the death of a partner, and some for seemingly no reason at all.

My prediction? One of the ladies will be single, and this show will be her coming out in terms of being a woman on the market in 2021. Times are different, so let’s see if the ladies can adapt. And maybe Carrie will actually get over her fear of technology and have a — gasp — iPhone.

Here’s what I’d love to see in the new iteration of Sex and the City:

  • One or more of the characters doing online dating.
  • One of the characters realizing that she’s bi or pansexual and dating other women.
  • Sex. I mean, it’s in the title. Let’s not leave it out. Though, I’m curious to know who will take the lead on that sans Samantha.
  • Someone maturely breaking it off with a date by saying something like, “I’m just not feeling the connection, but I wish you all the best.”
  • Empowerment for being single, showing that it’s not just okay to not have a partner, but it’s a valid choice. Better to be single than in a bad relationship.

Is there anything else you’d like to see in "SATC" 2021?
Erika Ettin is the founder of A Little Nudge, where she helps others navigate the often intimidating world of online dating. ©2020 Erika Ettin Distributed by Tribune Content Agency, LLC.

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