Brian Matuszak column: Brian embraces his random side once again
So this past week was crazy busy, what with the robotics competition at the DECC (I defeated R2-D2 in charades, but lost the karaoke contest to Mr. Roboto), the launch of my new line of Fruits That Resemble Duluth City Councilors (embarrassingly,...
So this past week was crazy busy, what with the robotics competition at the DECC
(I defeated R2-D2 in charades, but lost the karaoke contest to Mr. Roboto), the launch of my new line of Fruits That Resemble Duluth City Councilors (embarrassingly, I picked the Joel Sipress too early), and loading up all the snow in downtown Duluth and bringing it to Channel 3 where it will never be seen again. In fact, I was so busy I missed my self-imposed deadline for this week’s Budgeteer column. Luckily, I’ve been squirreling away some Random Thoughts for just such an occasion. Enjoy these while I finish up scraping the last few flakes off the frozen smokers outside the Holiday Center.
•Fun Fact: the Lego Movie is popular. The Leggo My Eggo Movie is not.
•I am giving up giving up things for Lent. Bring on the Reese’s Peanut Butter Crosses!
•If abnormal bleeding means I should talk to my doctor, who do I talk to about my normal bleeding?
•This harsh winter, the ice cover on Lake Superior is at a record 95 percent. To put that in perspective, it’s only 8 percent more than Harrison Ford.
•It’s funny how fast things can change. Two weeks ago, the phrase “Ellen’s Oscar selfie blew up on Twitter” sounded like gibberish. Today, it still sounds like gibberish, but at least we have a visual.
•Panera Bread has several job openings, with benefits that include competitive wages, food discounts and holiday pay. In fact, the only downside is that you will be working at Panera Bread.
•Reality shows need to juice up the ratings and I’m here to help with: “Celebrity Duck Dynasty,” featuring Scrooge McDuck, “The Raspy Voice” and “Pole Dancing With The Stars.”
•You’re welcome, America.
•I never sprang forward with my microwave clock. Now I have to wait an hour longer for my frozen breakfast tequila sandwiches.
Brian Matuszak is the founder of Rubber Chicken Theater and invites you to follow them on Twitter, Facebook, and on their website (RubberChickenTheater.com). He encourages everyone to check out Wise Fool Shakespeare’s production of “Macbeth” on March 14-16.