So the king and queen of Norway were in town, and they needed a place to stay. Apparently, all the local hotel rooms were booked because the Gopher hockey fans were giddy with their weekend win over the Bulldogs, and they didn't want to go home right away; they decided to stick around 'til Wednesday to rub our noses in it. That's fine - we'd have done the same thing - but I do think the hanging of a thousand brooms off the roof of the Radisson was a bit much. And potentially dangerous. What if that rotating restaurant on top had decided to amp up its speed? Those brooms would have acted as propellers, and the entire structure would have become airborne and landed in Proctor! Then we'd have another big, empty hole in the middle of downtown Duluth. Speaking of which, there was room in the Norshor Theater, so the city let the king and queen crash there for a few days. I would have thought they'd get better arrangements, but apparently, Don Ness got busy writing his Fifth Inaugural Address and forgot they were coming.
Anyway, the entire town was abuzz with Norwegian fever! The Last Place on Earth offered 20 percent off all synthetic pickled herring, while the Duluth Festival Opera staged another white-bread opera called Lefse-ohantas. A couple of other local groups were planning on honoring the king and queen by bathing in lutefisk, but that didn't work out. Seems the word "bathe" spooked the Occupy Duluth protestors, and the Duluth City Council always smells like that.
I, myself, was excited to see the newly renovated Enger Park, so I went up for an Invitation Only Sneak Peek to check it out. And by "Invitation Only", I mean I snuck in through the back nine of the golf course. I have to say, I liked the addition of the Henrik Ibsen Pavilion, complete with doll houses and wild ducks, but I was a little surprised at how they changed Enger Tower into an authentic replica of the famous Norwegian painting "The Scream." It's cool, but I wonder about the wisdom of busting the Leif Erickson Viking Ship into two pieces and placing both halves on either side of the tower, representing hands on the side of the face. I think Neill Atkins may be the one screaming after he sees that.
All in all, it was an exciting week for Duluth. People in fancy crowns and garish uniforms parading through downtown immediately after an icy butt-whipping delivered by rabid gophers.
Or, as they refer to it in Superior: Tuesday.
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Brian Matuszak has been difficult and demanding since February 2008. He is the co-founder of Renegade Comedy Theatre, founder of Rubber Chicken Theater, and is appearing in "Resurrection Blues" at St. Scholastica right now. It is a comedy, and the second-to-last play written by Arthur Miller, who enjoyed the process of comedy writing so much that he was planning on reworking some of his more famous plays to lighten them up a bit. Sadly, he passed away before finishing "Death of a Tupperware Salesman."
