Brian Matuszak column: Brian has pressing deadlines, including coming up with a funny headline (too late)
So I hope you’ll forgive me if I seem a little tense, but I’ve got several project deadlines this week that are ready to come crashing through the walls like a giant, sweaty pitcher of Kool-Aid.RELATED CONTENT
So it’s September and as you can see by the merchandise lining the shelves of your local department store, it’s Christmas.RELATED CONTENT
So it’s Labor Day Weekend, which, in my house growing up, meant it was a full-fledged Jerry Lewis Weekend.RELATED CONTENT
So I used to think that “talk radio” on WDSM was the biggest misnomer in the Twin Ports (since their announcers can’t actually talk), but I recently discovered a place that not only possesses a whopper of an incorrect name, it’s also an ironic one: Canal Park.RELATED CONTENT
So even though they’re technically over, the Dog Days of Summer continue to drink from the toilet of my creativity, metaphorically speaking.RELATED CONTENT
So all the excitement surrounding the announcement of a new time-traveling doctor last week by the BBC for its hit television show “Doctor Who” got me to thinking about the actual possibility of traversing through time. And that the Brits get awfully excited about their fictional characters.RELATED CONTENT
So by the time you read this, our ranks of married couples will have increased by a significant number. Same-sex marriage became legal on August 1 and now even more Minnesota citizens can experience the joy, and irritation, of wedded life.RELATED CONTENT
So everyone was dusting off their “avast, matey” and “thar she blows” this week as we all waited for the arrival of the tall ships to Duluth’s waterfront.RELATED CONTENT
Sometimes you have to set the exclamation marks aside and let loose with some rumbling rants of frustration, not only to purge the negativity that is draped around your soul, but also to make yourself look good.RELATED CONTENT
So the Big 5-0 finally rolled in for me last week, but it wasn’t Hawaii Five-0.RELATED CONTENT
BRIAN MATUSZAK: So you know that chunk of time you have right around the second or third weekend in November when Thanksgiving is so close it causes your chest to cinch up tighter than Jim Stauber’s wallet because you realize your year is basically over?
BRIAN MATUSZAK: So, there used to be a time when a sketch comedy artist could stand on a stage in this town, utter the words “Jeno” and “Fedo” for two hours, and audiences would eat it up. Sadly, that time has now come to an end.
So, it’s Thanksgiving weekend, which means a lot of lethargic napping after turkey interaction. Or, as we refer to it in Minnesota: Vikings game day. I’m too groggy to concentrate, so let’s silly things up with another random thoughts column!
So, judging by all the Halloween merchandise on clearance (I can’t imagine why more people didn’t buy the fake Kardashian butts at K-Mart, but at 75percent off, I’ll take ‘em all – never know when you’ll have to host a Packer Party) and by all the Christmas stuff being shoved in my face faster than the Duluth School Board hustles Art Johnston out of closed-door meetings, I’d say the holidays are in full swing. But during this busy time of year, please don’t forget about Thanksgiving.RELATED CONTENT